OBSESSING: Will it Bring Success or Harm?
By Cie Ann Scott, Ph.D.
woman.jpg Obsessing over someone is not only a turn-off, it is harmful. It is typical in this type of
scenario that the subject of obsession may be driven away forever by this tormenting experience.
“Set something free…” has far more possibility than “Chase it to death.”
Read More If the subject of the obsession can prove this to law enforcement, you could have a
penalty to pay, along with a broken heart. It is far better to heal yourself alone than to bother and
abuse someone you love, even if it doesn’t seem to be abusive.
Understand this: There is nothing that you ‘have to’ have. Just be open and loving and see what
happens. Being loving is described in the Love and Relationships chapter. Please don’t improvise
with obsession in your heart. I will not tell you that an obsessive person will not have difficulty with
this. I am definitely saying that obsessing can only make matters worse.
Sometimes we want something so badly that we feel we can’t live without it. With every kind of
effort we make, we strive for this, whether it’s a person, an object, or a position to capture.
Sometimes we dig a deeper hole instead of gaining on what we want. The condition we believe
we can’t live without practically spits back in our face! Obsessive behavior such as stalking IS
ALWAYS inappropriate and will push that which you desire away from you. If a person doesn’t want
you, you have not found the right person. There is definitely someone more suitable. If the goal is a
situation, you must feel at one with it. In the movie Caddyshack,Chevy Chase says, “Be the ball”.
Be at one with what you want. Do visioning exercises imagining yourself attaining this goal. Know
it is already yours. If you believe you are separate you will have to chase it, and then you’ll never
catch it. Successful athletes, businesspeople, musicians, and other professional utilize this
visioning technique all the time. Shaq’s personal affirmation is, “The world is mine.” Shaq can
transcend the NBA, at one with the movie business, or anything he chooses. He wasn’t more
entitled than you or anyone else – he just believes the world is his more than most people allow
themselves to believe. Remember, there is no separation from what you want, and buying into
separation and lack is just buying into an illusion.
If manipulation or obsession is a problem for you, as hard as it seems, JUST BACK OFF! You will
later receive “that” which you desire or something better and more aligned with your wants and